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When Does Secret Santa Mean Secret Emotional Affair?

Everybody has received gifts in the past. Whether it small or big, personal or impersonal, lavish or simple, gifts are just a part of life. The act of giving is something special and in many cases requires a lot of attention to detail.

In essence, to give someone a gift is almost like giving a piece of you to that person. It is a commitment between you and that person and creates a very special bond, even if only on a subconscious level.

A gift is a special thing and should not be given lightly to just anybody. Giving a gift to someone you’ve just met is an excellent way to let them know you’re interested in pursuing a worthwhile relationship. Giving a gift to someone you’ve known for a long

There may be many excuses such as “I am just a giving person”, yet if the gifts always seem to be destined to one specific person, then you can be sure that an emotional bond is being developed.

What Do Gifts Mean to People & Couples?

A gift means that you “know” the person well enough to give them something they’ll like. It means that you have already invested enough time to understand what the person needs.

Therefor gift giving isn’t something innocent, unless you’re giving a food basket to the homeless.

Also, a gift is a subconscious commitment with the other person; you always give to get something back. Even if you think deep inside that you don’t want anything back, you at least expect a bit of gratitude.

When we talk about emotional affairs, the act of gifting serves to solidify the bonds between the recipient and the giver.

This obviously excludes things like Secret Santa gifting and similar giving actions that simply states that the giver is a “generous” person. Yet when Secret Santa keeps on giving to one particular individual you’ll definitely know that Santa might be secretly having an affair.

How Many Gifts Have You Given in the Past?

Think hard on your past…How many gifts have you given in the past?

The answer will most probably not be too high; try to exclude holidays and birthdays. People generally give only when there is incentive to give; anything outside of this incentive will definitely have alternate motives behind it.

Think on when you have given gifts to people – What did those gifts mean to the person, especially if it wasn’t something like a birthday gift or Christmas?

If your spouse is “giving” things to a person other than you, what is the motive behind the gift?

What is he or she getting out of giving the gift?

When to Start Looking for Receipts?

If the giving becomes a bit more constant, it may be a good idea to look for other receipts or extra charges on the credit cards.

Look specifically what the gift was; it will give you insight on the motivation behind the action of giving. How intimate were the gifts and what was the amount of money spent on the gift itself? These are all questions you must take into consideration in order to find out if your spouse is actually having an affair or not.

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